Recipes

Frozen Banana Pops

Frozen bananas make you feel like you’re at the boardwalk even if you’re just standing in front of an oscillating fan in your apartment. USE YOUR IMAGINATION BITCH. Make some of these with the kids, they love that shit. 

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Blueberry Almond Muffins

Why have a bowl of sugar and milk in the morning when you can have a motherfuckin muffin? In less than an hour you can have these antioxidant packed breakfast boys in your gut. MAKE A BREAKFAST WORTH WAKING UP FOR.

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Hot Chocolate Mix

This winter why not treat yourself to something like a big mug of this holiday hottie? Or if you’re the generous type, throw a big bath of this mix in a jar, slap a fucking bow on it, and now you’ve got a cheap and tasty gift.

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Frosted Gingerbread Bites

Last minute holiday shopping? FUCK ALL THAT NOISE. Why don’t you stay home and celebrate in style with some of these spicy sweet bastards?

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Beastless Feasts

As we do every holiday season we put together this dope database of recipes from our site and books to help you survive the season. If you already got our books, you're probably a well-adjusted and beautiful person. If not, don't fret.

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Lavender Lemonade

Five simple fucking ingredients in this shit right here. Whip up this high class cocktail when you're feelin sweaty but fancy. And no high-fructose fuckery either. Splash this with some vodka and UNLOCK MAX RELAX MODE.

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