Recipes

Feel like you're getting sick? Even just reading this you gotta tickle in your throat? Fuck it, might as well make some lentil soup just in case. 

Last minute holiday shopping? FUCK ALL THAT NOISE. Why don’t you stay home and celebrate in style with some of these spicy sweet bastards?

Repurposing Thanksgiving leftovers in a sandwich is so damn predictable. When you're cramming cold chaos between a couple slices of bread just to eat over the kitchen sink, you've given up.

"I HATE BRUSSEL SPROUTS" - someone who's never had our brussel sprouts

For the rest of us who enjoy stuffing that WASN’T cooked in a bird’s ass, carb load up with our Sourdough Herb Stuffing. You’ll need your energy to flip the table when Nana starts in on the election.

Don’t let summer slip by without sipping on this refreshing sonuvabitch. Plums, plucots, pluots, use whatthefuckever you can find. LEVEL UP YOUR LIBATIONS.

Five simple fucking ingredients in this shit right here. Whip up this high class cocktail when you're feelin sweaty but fancy. And no high-fructose fuckery either. Splash this with some vodka and UNLOCK MAX RELAX MODE.

Burgers are so bland that’s why you basically gotta dress that shit up with a salad after you grill it. CUT OUT THE MIDDLE MEAT AND JUST GRILL A SALAD. 

THIS IS A PEANUT BUTTER CUP IN THE SIZE YOU ALWAYS WANTED BUT WERE TOO ASHAMED TO ASK FOR DON'T WORRY YOU'RE NOT ALONE THERE ARE MILLIONS OF US OUT THERE PEANUT BUTTER CUP JUNKIES RISE UP