You know damn well you don’t eat enough fruit but you sure as shit hit that waffle quota every month. Why not sneak some fruit into your batter for a sweet winter treat that will make you feel less guilty for your waffle habit.
Tired of the same old mayo-mess of pasta salad spoiling in the summer sun? Ditch that cream colored bullshit and get with this fiber rich son of a bitch.
You can still eat like a kid because NOSTALGIA ISN'T JUST FOR SHITTY MUSIC
COLON CANCER AIN'T FUCKING AROUND. You gotta eat more broccoli bc it's like a toothbrush for your asshole. It's way more effective and a HELLUVALOT CHEAPER than a juice cleanse.
This holiday season don't just stay warm, PUT A ROARING FUCKING FIREPLACE IN YOUR GUT. BREATHE FIRE. SLAY THE HOLIDAYS. DRINK RESPONSIBLY BITCHES.
Don’t use Halloween as an excuse to count a big ass bag of mediocre candy as a snack. You know damn well that shit is just going to fuck with your stomach. Instead calm your cravings with this coconut caramel dip.
From October to New Years this sweet and savory sauce gets drizzled on JUST.ABOUT.EVERY.GODDAMN.THING but especially fruit.
These tangy sons of bitches add a crunch to any salad, sandwich, or try em in a taco. Plus the pink makes even the most basic dishes look elevated as hell. Easy, tasty, instagrammable.
This summer weather isn’t waiting on the ice cream truck to start making the rounds. But before you start pulling out your cash and that dusty ass fan from last year, whip up a batch of these sweet sons of bitches to help you keep your cool.
Cranberry sauce is a holiday leftover that just keeps on givin. You can put that shit in a sandwich, mix it in a salad, or even a cocktail. So go rescue that cranberry sauce from the back of the fridge and GET LIT WITH LEFTOVERS.
PUT.THE.FUCKING.CAN.OPENER.DOWN. Trust us on this shit. Just look at the sugar content in that canned cranberry crap THEN check the serving size. GODDAMN RIGHT?!
